Authors Revealed
Author: snshyne // Category:
Best Appetizer
Author: snshyne // Category:Best Appetizer...
Best Main Course
Author: snshyne // Category:Best Main Course
Second Place: A Bun in the Oven by Cilla1970
Best Dessert
Author: snshyne // Category:Best Dessert...
First Place: A Taste of Fire by pkmarita
Second Place (tie): Bitchin' in the Kitchen by frantic-daydreamer
Second Place (tie): Bay Boy by SnowWhiteHeart
Special Award: Best Name
Author: snshyne // Category:
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Daniel Gale Judge's Choice
Author: snshyne // Category:Daniel Gale
from Daniel Gale: Cumming to America by Danielgaleh00rs/Annetteskitty
The Daniel Gale Award of excellence goes to Not Your Average Food Fetish
I’ve been a very busy boy lately. (No, it wasn’t because I was pleasuring myself
whilst fantasizing about my Bella’s bootylicious backside.) I was busy reading this
collection of fabulous one-shot stories and one story in particular grabbed my attention.
Not Your Average Food Fetish is brilliant little story from a beautiful young woman’s point of
view. Coincidentally, her name is Bella. In this, she tells the story of how she met and fell
in love with a socially awkward, yet incredibly sexy young man. I could completely relate to
this bloke.
I loved that this was not a love at first sight story. Although Bella found Edward attractive,
she also thought he was a “weirdo”. However, a little persistence (and snazzy attire) on
this young gentleman’s part led him to a proper date with Bella where he wooed her with
his charms.
Good strategy, mate!
"Very funny. I mean, are you seeing anyone?"
"I'm seeing you," he sweetly told me with a smirk on his lips and then leaned forward
with his elbows on the table—his long slender fingers creating a bridge between his
hands.
"Oh? So you're seeing me now?" I playfully asked.
"I only see you."
This story does a great job in demonstrating that even that odd, nerdy guy with few social
graces can be one smooth panty-melting bastard. I need to get in touch with him and get
some advice!
What I found most refreshing was that Edward was appreciated for his quirky personality,
patience, and kindness - qualities that are underappreciated, in my opinion. Bella fell in
love with him for the way he was and his ability to change her perspective on life. One
could really tell that this was not just a sexy one-shot but a sweet love story.
I really appreciated the way the author made me fall in love with the characters so that
we were warmed up and ready for the hot, yet strange, lemon. Who would have thought
that cutting the crotch of a woman’s sweatpants to perform cunnilingus on her would be so
tantalizing?
All-in-all the author did a fantastic job of telling her story in less than 5000 words. Not a
word was wasted and paradoxically, I came away feeling both satisfied and wanting a bit
more. I really hope this story continues on.
I’ve been a very busy boy lately. (No, it wasn’t because I was pleasuring myself
whilst fantasizing about my Bella’s bootylicious backside.) I was busy reading this
collection of fabulous one-shot stories and one story in particular grabbed my attention.
Not Your Average Food Fetish is brilliant little story from a beautiful young woman’s point of
view. Coincidentally, her name is Bella. In this, she tells the story of how she met and fell
in love with a socially awkward, yet incredibly sexy young man. I could completely relate to
this bloke.
I loved that this was not a love at first sight story. Although Bella found Edward attractive,
she also thought he was a “weirdo”. However, a little persistence (and snazzy attire) on
this young gentleman’s part led him to a proper date with Bella where he wooed her with
his charms.
Good strategy, mate!
"Very funny. I mean, are you seeing anyone?"
"I'm seeing you," he sweetly told me with a smirk on his lips and then leaned forward
with his elbows on the table—his long slender fingers creating a bridge between his
hands.
"Oh? So you're seeing me now?" I playfully asked.
"I only see you."
This story does a great job in demonstrating that even that odd, nerdy guy with few social
graces can be one smooth panty-melting bastard. I need to get in touch with him and get
some advice!
What I found most refreshing was that Edward was appreciated for his quirky personality,
patience, and kindness - qualities that are underappreciated, in my opinion. Bella fell in
love with him for the way he was and his ability to change her perspective on life. One
could really tell that this was not just a sexy one-shot but a sweet love story.
I really appreciated the way the author made me fall in love with the characters so that
we were warmed up and ready for the hot, yet strange, lemon. Who would have thought
that cutting the crotch of a woman’s sweatpants to perform cunnilingus on her would be so
tantalizing?
All-in-all the author did a fantastic job of telling her story in less than 5000 words. Not a
word was wasted and paradoxically, I came away feeling both satisfied and wanting a bit
more. I really hope this story continues on.
Dee Judge's Choice
Author: snshyne // Category:Dee
Eight Days a Week by 107yearoldvirgin
I know this thing started out as a way to teach little Danny how to get his girl to let them ‘fornicate’, but I actually think that each of us walked away with a little bit more than we intended to learn.
We’d sat in that class for at least an hour, maybe more, looking at these stories that we’d originally thought were just about screwing, but ended up being about food and love…and now I sound gay.
Anyway, one particular story made Don knock on my zipper more than once, and that was The Way the Cookie Crumbles. And Amber was all kinds of stupid over it, so I told her that we’d choose this one to give an award to.
See, Amber’s got this thing for stories that are set in an office. She’s all, “My cube sucks the very life out of me and stole my soul, blah, blah, blah.” So, when she saw that the fic had cubes in it and the writer used the term ‘prairie dog’ to describe other cube dwellers… And then, dear God, this chick in the story trips and flashes her ass… Amber was throwing up a fist pump faster than you can say, ‘Umi Zoomi’.
I personally enjoyed the way the author described Bella’s love for cooking. My inner kid got hungry for some sables.
Amber said something about some Sarah Michelle Gellar movie where her emotions were in her food, or whatever, and I just scratched my beanie because I don’t watch chick flicks, but she said this story reminded her of that.
It reminded me of getting head on the No Shaggin’ Wagon.
So, anyway, the dude in the story is pretty cool and he’s looking for love and Bella’s looking for love and she bakes her wishes and tears into her cookies and ends up getting laid on a Volvo. Need I say more?
Don says, ‘No’.
Congrats to the author of this story for making this cooking class worthwhile. And for giving me a new recipe to try out when I get the kids into bed…and Don into Bella’s Cave of Wonders.
Dickward Judge's Choice
Author: snshyne // Category:Dickward
from Edward Cullen: Dick for Hire by fl95
I gotta fucking admit, it was hard as hell to find a favorite goddamn story in this contest but when I came across this one, I stopped one chuckle short of a goddamn hyperventilation.
Not only is the Bella in this fuckery like, my sister from another motherfuckin’ mister, but she made excellent use of the phrase “shitty shitty” and she’s…quite goddamn feisty. Also , major props to this writer for best use of Batman references (eg: Holy fudgesicles, I had a date. )
Her inner ramblings were fucking hilarious and the fact that she popped this dude’s cherry for him, so to speak, just made it all that better in my humble motherfucking opinion, that is. I mean, she’s completely unselfish and giving, in a very sexy, I haven’t had sex in a long goddamn time and this dude is making me shimmy like a porn star kinda way.
I think Jo liked that she was a hair dresser too, just sayin.
When she realizes he’s NOT a day over eighteen (he’s two days over, just for the record)…I died and the fact that even though this guy is a virge…he’s still goddamn smooth as a ice, well…it just made me a seriously proud motherfucker.
Example numero uno:
"But you're so confident," I panted, "and you really seem to know what you're doing," I said as me rubbed the caramel across my tummy and onto my hips.
He leaned towards my face, and brushed my hair aside. "I have a lot of pent up desire," he said, velvet voice licking my ears, "and a great imagination," he added with a smile.
Need I say more?
Seriously.
The pacing was great and the lead up to their “date” was fun to read.
The ice cream based innuendo turn with the hardening and the licking and the…well, you get my goddamn drift. It is all pure win and I give two thumbs up for this Edward bringing the whole goddamn store with him because, in his words, "I didn't know what you'd like, so I brought one of everything. I guess we'll have a smorgasbord."
NICE.
It’s hard as fuck (pun intended my friends) to get my ass to laugh at shit…especially in fan fiction, a lot of times it seems like it’s forced but I found myself chucking at just about every goddamn paragraph in this one.
Example number two is one of my favorite parts:
Our two ice-cream flavors were cookies and cream and the coffee brownie one I licked from his finger earlier. I got tingly and wished we got mint.
You know what that stuff does, don't deny it.
As for sauces, Edward picked up marshmallow, caramel magic shell, and…
…be still my aching heart…
…Nutella.
Do you think he'd mind if I proposed? We could run away to Vegas tonight, I think.
He caught me eyeballing the Nutella. "Good stuff, right?" he asked, nearly begging for my approval.
"Better than good," I half-whispered, and began separating the sprinkle-ables.
There were rainbow and chocolate jimmies, gummy bears, flaked coconut, and three different kind of nuts. "You look like a nut-lover," he said, then clasped his hand over his mouth in horror.
"I am! I am!" I reassured him, adding "I'm glad you got pre-crushed ones, because I hate having to bust them."
OH god.
Nutella, by the way, is the goddamn bomb, for those of you who are not aware of that fucking fact.
Example number three is a simple line that made me lose my shit and even Jo spit most of her goddamn Pepsi Max out…onto me, I might add.
He was an organized licker;
Now tell me, who doesn’t appreciate the fine art of organizing your pussy lickin?
Not me, ladies and gentlemen.
But I digress.
Listen, I could quote the whole damn story for ya here, but seriously, just…fucking read it, and laugh your ass off because this my friends, is the real deal.
Thanks for writing and when I find out who your ass is, I’ll be looking up some more of your shit.
Sincerely,
Cullen.
Flowerchild Judge's Choice
Author: snshyne // Category:Flowerchild
from The Workshop by danieller123
Flower Child reporting for duty...in a black tank top and not much else. He is accompanied by Bella. They are lounging poolside, in the shade of their Miami home.
"Jesus in a skillet. I could cook your nuts on that pavement it is so fucking hot out, Flower Child."
"I know, baby." Wipes Sweat from head. "But at least the kids look like their having fun."
Flower Child and Bella look towards where Squeaks and Anthony are splashing about. A smile creeps ion both of their faces.
Edward looks at Bella. "Ever think we'll have more?"
Bella shrugs. "I don't know. Why? Do you want..." She doesn't need to finish asking. The expression on his face says everything. Bella reaches for his cup. "I get you a refill."
She gets up and walk in to the house. Edward smiles after she leaves. They have had this non-conversation-conversation for the last three months.
Flower Child looks at the readers.
"You all know she is just being 'bella', right? I have seen the look in her face when she sees a little baby. I hear how she is sad that our son in getting older. I know Bella. I also see what she has been reading lately.
"Last week, there was this story on her computer I found. What? I wasn't snooping. she left the thing open. Okay, fine, I was snooping a little bit.
"Anyhow, the story was about a couple trying to have a baby. They had some trouble and chose to..."
Edward sit up straighter in his chair as Bella has returned.
"Drink." she site down the glass. "Look, it's not that i don't want more kids, Flower Child...I just......well I'm not a spring fucking chicken anymore. What if...."
Bella doesn't get to finish her sentence, as Edward is laughing his perfectly tanned ass off.
"Did you forget who I am, Angel?" He makes eyes that Bella can't resist.
"Yeah, yeah, I know....King Fucking Ding-a-ling. Srgt Sperm. Lord of the Ovaries. Butterbean's motherfucking kryptonite."
He shrugs. "So, what's the issue?"
"I am old, moron."
Flower Child laughs. "You're not old. Come to daddy and he'll show you." He makes face Bella hates and loves.
"Fuck off, Flower Child."
"Or we could try those thing from your story," he suggests.
"Story? What story?"
Her face scares him, but he proceeds. "The story you read last week. About the Bun in the Oven."
"I didn't...."
"I saw it on your computer. Don't lie." Edward smiles. "Besides, that shit with the food was sexy."
Bella smiles. "Why do i think I was reading it?"
"Wanna do some of that shit later?" He leans in closer and puts his mouth under her ear, making Butterbean flutter with excitement. "I vote for the Red Coral Lettuce shit.....that was..."
And he finishes how he feels by biting at her neck.
Butterbean is a happy, happy girl.
Bella is a little bit breathless. "I liked the part with the belly button. It reminds me of..."
And she finishes how she feels by letting her finger slide over his well-toned abs, along hishappy trail she finds attractive.
Flower Child pulls her into his lap. She straddles him and with one quick check to make sure their kids are not drowning, nor watching, he pulls her bikini top to the side and palms her breasts.
"We are breaking out the fucking marshmallows," he takes a taste of her nipple. "The chcolate sauce....." another taste. "Mmmm, fucking..." his mouth is very busy.
"Strawberries. There were strawberries," Bella pants.
"Mmm. right."
Squeaks and Anthony screaming and running out of the pool brings them back to reality. Edward fixes Bella's top and kisses her.
"Later," he promises.
She simply smiles and scoots from his lap. They finish the day playing with their kids and when the 'later' arrives, Bella remembers the most important part of the story she read last week.
"Jesus in a skillet. I could cook your nuts on that pavement it is so fucking hot out, Flower Child."
"I know, baby." Wipes Sweat from head. "But at least the kids look like their having fun."
Flower Child and Bella look towards where Squeaks and Anthony are splashing about. A smile creeps ion both of their faces.
Edward looks at Bella. "Ever think we'll have more?"
Bella shrugs. "I don't know. Why? Do you want..." She doesn't need to finish asking. The expression on his face says everything. Bella reaches for his cup. "I get you a refill."
She gets up and walk in to the house. Edward smiles after she leaves. They have had this non-conversation-conversation for the last three months.
Flower Child looks at the readers.
"You all know she is just being 'bella', right? I have seen the look in her face when she sees a little baby. I hear how she is sad that our son in getting older. I know Bella. I also see what she has been reading lately.
"Last week, there was this story on her computer I found. What? I wasn't snooping. she left the thing open. Okay, fine, I was snooping a little bit.
"Anyhow, the story was about a couple trying to have a baby. They had some trouble and chose to..."
Edward sit up straighter in his chair as Bella has returned.
"Drink." she site down the glass. "Look, it's not that i don't want more kids, Flower Child...I just......well I'm not a spring fucking chicken anymore. What if...."
Bella doesn't get to finish her sentence, as Edward is laughing his perfectly tanned ass off.
"Did you forget who I am, Angel?" He makes eyes that Bella can't resist.
"Yeah, yeah, I know....King Fucking Ding-a-ling. Srgt Sperm. Lord of the Ovaries. Butterbean's motherfucking kryptonite."
He shrugs. "So, what's the issue?"
"I am old, moron."
Flower Child laughs. "You're not old. Come to daddy and he'll show you." He makes face Bella hates and loves.
"Fuck off, Flower Child."
"Or we could try those thing from your story," he suggests.
"Story? What story?"
Her face scares him, but he proceeds. "The story you read last week. About the Bun in the Oven."
"I didn't...."
"I saw it on your computer. Don't lie." Edward smiles. "Besides, that shit with the food was sexy."
Bella smiles. "Why do i think I was reading it?"
"Wanna do some of that shit later?" He leans in closer and puts his mouth under her ear, making Butterbean flutter with excitement. "I vote for the Red Coral Lettuce shit.....that was..."
And he finishes how he feels by biting at her neck.
Butterbean is a happy, happy girl.
Bella is a little bit breathless. "I liked the part with the belly button. It reminds me of..."
And she finishes how she feels by letting her finger slide over his well-toned abs, along hishappy trail she finds attractive.
Flower Child pulls her into his lap. She straddles him and with one quick check to make sure their kids are not drowning, nor watching, he pulls her bikini top to the side and palms her breasts.
"We are breaking out the fucking marshmallows," he takes a taste of her nipple. "The chcolate sauce....." another taste. "Mmmm, fucking..." his mouth is very busy.
"Strawberries. There were strawberries," Bella pants.
"Mmm. right."
Squeaks and Anthony screaming and running out of the pool brings them back to reality. Edward fixes Bella's top and kisses her.
"Later," he promises.
She simply smiles and scoots from his lap. They finish the day playing with their kids and when the 'later' arrives, Bella remembers the most important part of the story she read last week.
I collapse to the side of her breathing heavily. "I'm sorry I couldn't make you cum at the same time as me," I say breathlessly.
Bella giggles, and I get a little annoyed that she's laughing at me.
"What's so funny?" I ask. "I like it when we cum together, you know that."
"Yes, baby, I do, but do you know what the physical movement of a woman's orgasm is?" she asks as she rolls onto her stomach lying over my chest.
"No," I reply, swirling circles on her back with my fingers.
"Well, when a woman orgasms, her cervix dips into the pelvic cavity sucking up any liquid that might be pooled there. It's kind of like a little vacuum cleaner. So, when a woman climaxes after the man it increases the chances of getting pregnant, because there is something 'in the pool' to be sucked up. It just gives your little guys an extra push on their long journey." I smile at her and stick my tongue in my cheek.
And she waits until he has...and then she does. They do. And Bella is ridiculously happy weeks later when she has own little stick, with her own little positive and most importantly, her own little bun in the oven.